When I was getting my sweet son to sleep tonight, he said something wonderfully silly, as he often does. I hugged him and called him my “Sillybean,” as I often do. And he sleepily, lovingly, heart-fully muttered, as he was drifting off, “But I’m a good one, right?” I assured him he was the best Sillybean ever and that I love him very much.
My son is sleeping soundly now. And I am now writing to you, dear world.
(and our hamster Roly Poly is running with all her might on her Flying Saucer.)
Life is good.
Dr. Brene Brown wrote that “to practice courage, compassion, and connection is to look at life and the people all around us, and say, ‘I’m all in.'” When I first read that on the door of my then-yoga studio (a wonderful place where you’re given a generous space to practice all these things), I didn’t know they were Brene Brown’s words at the time. What I knew – what I felt was that those words ran right to the core of my heart and said, “Yes, we’d like to live here if you’ll let us.” That’s how I want to live. That’s how I want to be part of this world. I’d never seen it articulated so honestly and beautifully. Through my work in theater, particularly as an actor, I so believe this is why we need the arts, a place where we can be present together and share in a moment in time. But the older I get, I feel it’s more than that. I believe in my bones we are on this earth to be kind to each other and connect with each other. It’s what I try to instill in my son.
I mess up. A lot. I can be judgmental and scared and negative and melancholy sometimes. I take joy out of the world instead of putting it in. Some days I botch it all. Except that what I’ve found is that even on those days, some tiny ray of Grace seems to slip its way in, and boom: there’s that connection that moves me so. And that’s not me-Grace. That’s Universe-Grace, God-Grace, Prana-Grace, wherever that moment, where there’s hope and connection and compassion and the courage to keep going, comes from for you.
So. I’m here to explore that. This. All of this. I think. This is a new journey for me. But I’m hoping you’ll be part of it with me. We are all in this together, and I am grateful for you.